The Lost Knight
by ureshiitamago
Summary: A lady who is shorter than Will, who Halt (possibly) is scared of, and a knight/part time assassin with a terrible sense of direction. What fun! (Rated T because we're paranoid.) No romance except canon
1. The Return

**ureshiitamago: So, my friend acacia626 and I are collabing on this. :) I hope you all like it!**

**acacia626: Um, ok, so this is my first story, so…...yeah. And stuff.**

**ureshiitamago: -_-' not very talkative are you?**

**acacia626: No.**

**Evan: Can we get started before I have to poke you with my knitting needle?**

**Little Brother: Disclaimer; ureshiitamago and acacia626 don't own Ranger's Apprentice. And Warning, this will be set after the 11th book, but well before the 12th book. Also, Halt and Pauline will be younger. **

**Chapter 1: The Return**

Pauline, a tall and graceful grey haired woman, sat down with a cup of tea. Quietly, she sipped it while eyeing the others who were sitting around the living room with her. Will, Alyss, and Horace were currently visiting her and Halt in their small apartment in Castle Redmont. Halt looked at his wife fondly, and then glared at her choice of beverage. Despite having been married for nearly seven years, they still disagreed with each other over tea and coffee.

"So…" Will began, trying to keep his old mentor from glaring a hole into the tea cup. It was effective, the glare was redirected towards Will. He flinched slightly and then went on. "What was it that was in the report that I never got to see?" Halt's glare subsided a smidge.

"It was the movements of slave traders along the coast, and some movements of a new religion." Halt sneered slightly in disgust at the last statement. Will nodded slowly.

"So...we're going to do something about both of them, right?" He asked. Halt grinned feraly.

"Yes." Pauline smiled into her tea, and locked eyes with Alyss, who was also smiling in amusement. The girls grinned at each other, and rolled their eyes at their husbands antics. Horace looked up from the bread roll he was demolishing.

"I get to go too, right?" He asked, eyes flicking from Halt to Will. Will grinned at his friend, then looked at Halt pleadingly.

"As long as he doesn't eat all of our supplies." Halt growled in a mock fierce tone. Pauline set her cup back down on her saucer, and glanced from Halt to Will to Horace.

"Don't underestimate slavers." She said warningly. "They do the work that they do because they are great at not being caught." Halt looked at her askance.

"Are you suggesting that we won't catch them?" He asked suspiciously. Pauline smiled mysteriously.

"No. I'm just warning you." She said, sipping her tea once again. Halt glared at the cup in disgust, and then stood up, grabbing his bow and quiver from behind the chair he had been lounging in. Will and Horace followed suit. Horace, who was closest to the door, reached it first and opened it, only to have a small fist driven into his stomach. He quickly backpedaled, and winced in pain. Will peeked around his large friend, and saw a diminutive woman standing in the doorway with a puzzled look on her face.

"Since when did wooden doors suddenly turn into cloth?" She asked in a gravelly voice.

Will blinked. "Uh, the door opened?" He said questioningly. The lady let out a short bark of laughter.

"I get that." She remarked sarcastically. She tilted her head way back to look up at Horace. "Since when do they make size 'giants' in knights?" she asked.

"It's not my fault." Horace said under his breath. Then, in a louder tone, "I was born big." The lady eyed him up and down before snorting.

"Yeah, yeah. So was I." She said gloomily before pushing past Horace. "I was told that I could find Paulie here." she said in an explaining tone.

Pauline, who was just finishing her tea, noticed the tiny woman, and a wondering expression crossed her face.

"Evie**?!" **


	2. The Pint Sized Terror

**ureshiitamago: XD yay! This is going so smoothly! (Once the creative juices started flowing…)**

**acacia626: That took a while…**

**ureshiitamago: Well, **_**writing**_ **it did...actually getting the creative juices flowing took about 2 to 3 hours. And then you had to leave. **

**acacia626: Not my fault….**

**Evan: Just get started already. Disclaimer; they don't own Ranger's Apprentice. Done. Now start, before I kill you and dispose of your bodies.**

_Pauline, who was just finishing her tea, noticed the tiny woman, and a wondering expression crossed her face._

"_Evie?!"_

**Chapter 2: The Pint Sized Terror**

"I told you to call me Evan." The newly named Evie said, placing her hands on her hips and pouting at the much taller woman. Will wondered how it was anatomically possible for someone to be shorter than him.

"Well, I'm still going to call you Evie." Pauline said, sipping the last of her tea and setting it to the side.

"The rest of you better call me Evan." she growled fiercely at the rest of them. Will looked at Halt, who seemed to be trying to keep an expression of horror off of his face. He was failing miserably.

Pauline gracefully stood up and walked over to Evan, then grabbed her in a huge hug and swung her around like a little doll.

"Evie, I've missed you so much! We have to get caught up over tea. And we absolutely must go dress shopping for you!"

"Only if the dresses are chainmail." Evan remarked calmly from her position. She only looked slightly irritated that she was tiny enough for someone to easily pick up and swing around.

Pauline's expression of excitement slowly faded off her face, and she set Evan down.

"Perhaps another time, Evie dear." she said despairingly. Evan smiled in triumph. Finally, she seemed to notice that there were more people in the room other than the giant and Pauline. Her eyes narrowed at Halt, and Will noticed with interest that Halt looked more frightened than he usually did when Pauline suggested hair cuts.

"Pauline?" Evan asked. Her voice cut like a knife through the air. Once she was sure she had Pauline's attention, she pointed at Halt accusingly. "Why is _he_ here?"

Pauline smiled at Evan. "I married him, dear. Be nice."

Evan looked at Pauline out of the corner of her eye, her hand going to what looked like a knitting needle that was tucked into her belt. "I can't even disembowel him a little?" she asked, somewhat crestfallen.

"No, dear. Disemboweling people after seeing them for the first time in twenty years isn't very nice."

"Can I mortally wound him…" she looked at Halt, who was visibly sweating now. "...on his shoulder?"

"No, Evie. He needs his shoulder for fighting. I would like my husband to come back alive from his trip."

Evan pushed her bottom lip out and crossed her arms. In that pose, she looked very much like a little kid who was told that they couldn't have any candy. Will looked back and forth between Evan and Halt, wondering what the big deal was between them to make Halt look so...dare he think it...afraid.

"I can't even wound him a little?" Evan was saying.

Pauline smiled at her tolerably. "No, Evangeline. I would like my husband to be safe and have no wounds caused by my best friend. Tea?" Evan glared at Pauline.

"Don't call me that." she demanded. "And no, I prefer coffee." Pauline looked a little put out.

"You had better ask Halt then. I don't know how to make coffee."

"You just admitted you don't know something!" Evan exclaimed, her jaw dropping in astonishment. "Wow! Maybe marriage is good for you!" She noticed Halt standing up a bit straighter after that comment and added; "I still hate _him_ though."

Will coughed apologetically. "Um, so, Pauline, how do you know Evan?" he asked, using Evan's prefered name. Evan smiled at him.

"Thank you for using the name I actually like." she said happily. "And I knew Pauline before _he_" she jerked her thumb in Halt's direction, "ever did."

Will nodded slowly, taking in Halt's pale face. He grinned to himself, and asked, "How come you don't like Halt?" Evan sniffed in disdain.

"He calls me by the name I hate." she said irritably. Will's eyebrow shot up.

"Is that the only reason?" he asked incredulously. Evan had the grace to look a little bit sheepish.

"Kind of. I also knew that he 'had the hots' for Paulie. I'm kind of a mama bear over my friends." she explained to Will. He smirked and looked at Halt, whose face was now a bright red and covered by his palm.

"Anyway. I'm sorry it took me twenty years to show up again, Paulie." Evan said, turning to Pauline. "Your castle misplaced itself."

Pauline raised a slender eyebrow at the black-haired woman.

"I think you mean that you got lost." she said seriously. Evan's teal eyes narrowed at the taller woman.

"No, your castle moved itself when I wasn't looking." she said slowly.

Pauline raised her eyes to heaven. "No, you got lost."

"No, the castle moved."

"Did you ask for directions?" Evan hesitated slightly.

"Ye-es?" she drew out the word and turned it into a question, something that Will used to do.

Pauline put her hand to her head. "Did you _follow_ the directions?" Evan drew herself up as tall as she could muster.

"Of course. They just kept on changing the directions." she said haughtily.

Pauline hid a smile. "Which way did the directions say to go?"

"North." Evan said after a pause in which she seemed to be trying to remember what the directions were. Will watched the conversation in fascination. Never before had he come across someone with such a horrid sense of direction. "So I climbed a tree." Evan went on.

"Do you know which way north is?" Pauline asked. Evan mutely pointed up. Pauline hid her face in her hands.

"No, Evie. North is that way." she said, and pointed out the window. Evan looked out the window.

"No, that's left." she said in a that's-so-obvious tone.

Pauline rolled her eyes. "It's also north. And guess what? South is also right." Evan looked at her askance.

"No, South is that way." she said, pointing to the ground. At this point, Will was sure that Evan was just playing with Pauline. He looked sideways at Horace, who seemed to be trying to smother laughter. Unfortunately, a snort escaped, and was heard. Evan's head shot in the direction of the snort, and Will jumped to the side, avoiding her glare which could rival Halt's when he didn't have coffee in the morning. Her eyes narrowed dangerously at Horace, whose shoulders were shaking with mirth.

"Something funny, kid?" She asked in a raspy voice.

Horace went pale, and stopped laughing. He shook his head violently, hoping to avoid bodily injury. Evan smiled, and walked over to him, and then grabbed his ear and pulled him down so that he was face to face with her. She looked at him, noting the various scratches and the muscles.

"I've decided." she said. Horace let out a questioning grunt. She smiled a smile that Horace would soon learn to fear. "I'm going to mentor you." she said delightedly. "Eh, what's your name, kid?"

Horace was crying internally, but he responded in a strong voice. "Horace Altman." Evan nodded.

"Okay, Horace, just call me Evan." she said. She whipped her head to look at Alyss. "And you?"

Alyss gulped, but smiled and said, "Alyss Mainwaring, ma'am." Evan snorted.

"Don't call me ma'am. It makes me feel as old as Paulie." She said. "Call me Evan, or as Paulie does, Evie." Alyss smiled warmly at her.

"Auntie Evie, then." Evan grimaced a little at the addition, but didn't correct Alyss. Will thought he was forgotten until her finger was pointing in his face.

"You, young-in. What's your name?" Will wanted to run away, but he pushed away the urge.

"My name is Will." He said, and in the rush, completely forgot to add his new-ish last name. Evan's eyebrow rose.

"No last name?" She asked curiously. Will mutely shook his head, deeming it too late to add it in. He was expecting her to look at him pityingly, or laugh. She smiled.

"Same as me then." She said. Will looked at her in astonishment. "I had one...I think...at some point...hmm." she seemed to be trying to remember her last name, and then she shrugged, giving up. "I guess that makes you my protege." she said happily, and then hooked her arm around Will's neck before he could move, and gave him a knuckle sandwich.

Will let out a yelp. "Hey! What are….hey…...Stop!" Evan chuckled as she continued to administer the knuckle sandwich.

"Tough love kid! Get used to it!"


	3. The Look

**Here's a quick letter from the authors. We would like to thank everything ecstatic and moniquebowman for reviewing! To answer your question, moniquebowman, ;) you're going to find out in this chapter, so don't worry. And everything ecstatic; here's your next chapter! We would like to also thank Willow Treaty for following and favoriting! Here's a cookie for you guys! (::) (::) (::)**

**ureshiitamago: *kisses* we love you!**

**acacia626: :) thank's for liking this fic, and reviewing!**

**ureshiitamago: Disclaimer; we don't own Ranger's Apprentice (though it would be awesome if we did) We only own this original story line and any OCs that crop up. (And there will be a few others than Evan, she isn't our absolute favorite :P)**

**Evan: Hey! Come here you!**

**ureshiitamago: AAAAAAAAAH! *runs away from knitting needle wielding maniac* **

_Will let out a yelp. "Hey! What are….hey…...Stop!" Evan chuckled as she continued to administer the knuckle sandwich._

"_Tough love kid! Get used to it!"_

**Chapter 3: The Look**

Evan finally let go of Will after much persuasion on Paulines' part. Most of which involved polite asking and gentle tugging of the arm until Pauline finally crossed her arms and frowned at her old friend. Her old friend knew that if she didn't stop, she would be dead soon, so she stopped. Evan grinned meekly at Pauline, and stepped away from Will.

"You were going somewhere?" Evan asked Will. He nodded, still rubbing his head where she had knuckle sandwiched him.

"They were going to see Baron Arald." Pauline said in a slightly clipped tone. Evan looked at her with slightly narrowed eyes, trying to gauge how irritated her old friend was. Taking in the small dimple in between Paulines' eyebrows, Evan concluded that Pauline was _very_ irritated indeed.

"Heh heh. May I ask why?" Evan asked, suddenly the epitome of politeness. Will and Alyss glanced at each other in amusement. Halt seemed to be recovering from whatever mental blow Evan's presence had brought, and he was now motioning towards the door behind Evan's back. Will was the first to understand that Halt wanted to leave Evan here, and so he inclined his head to Pauline in a goodbye while the lady was explaining the nature of the visit to her friend. Pauline nodded back, and he, Horace, and Halt tip toed towards the door.

"Perhaps, Evie dear, you would like to go with them on their quest?" Pauline asked, well aware that her husband _really_ didn't want that. The three men froze, and slowly turned back around. Will made a face at Alyss, who was trying and failing to hide her laughter.

"Hmmm…" Evan hummed thoughtfully, "I don't see why not."

"I do…" Halt muttered to himself, making sure that it was quiet enough that no one could hear him except for Will and Horace. Horace snorted quietly, and Will's lips twitched upwards a little bit. Evan turned around and clapped her hands in one smooth motion.

"Well, boys, let's get gone." she said in an energized voice. Her eyes and smile were both unnaturally wide, and she strode past them out the door, grabbing hold of Will's ear and Halt's ear, dragging them with her, leaving Horace to follow. He was about to say something, but one look at Pauline made him gulp and race out the door after them. People chasing after him with swords and other weapons he could handle, but an angry woman? No sir, that's where he drew the line.

Evan continued to drag the two by their ears until she thought she was far enough away from Paulines' scary irritatedness, and then she let go, and stood against a wall. She let out a long sigh.

"Yeesh, Paulie's still got _the look_, doesn't she?" she asked Halt, completely forgetting that she was supposed to hate him for a moment. Halt nodded sympathetically. He had been on the receiving end of _the look_ many times, and all were frightening.

"Uum, Evan? Mind if I ask you something?" Horace asked, having finally caught up to them. Evan raised her eyebrows and grinned feraly.

"You already did, kid. But shoot." she responded. Horace looked at Will, who looked at Halt, who looked back at Will, who looked back at Horace, who shrugged and looked back at Evan.

"Why do you wear trousers, a chainmail skirt, and chestplate armor?" he asked. Evan's grin widened, if that was anatomically possible.

"'Cause I'm a Lady Knight, kid. Next question." Will and Horace stared at her in disbelief while Halt just sighed and shook his head.

"Um, ok...why do you have a sword strapped to your back and a knitting needle in your belt?" he asked, pointing to the said items in turn. Evan nodded seriously.

"I'm a knight, these," she gestured to the sword and knitting needle, "are my weapons." there was a moment of silence.

"A KNITTING NEEDLE?" Both Will and Horace shouted at the same time. Evan cringed, and clapped her hands over her ears.

"Whoa, boys. Keep it down to a holler. Yeah, a knitting needle." she said irritably.

"Why don't you tell them why." Halt gently prodded, only to turn pale when she glared at him and whipped said knitting needle out from its place on her belt. She turned to Will and Horace, waved the knitting needle in front of them, and then proceeded to lightly press her fingertip on the point of the needle. Blood immediately welled, and she held up the now injured finger to show them the wound.

"What is it made of?" Will finally managed to ask, staring at the totally innocent looking wooden knitting needle.

"Same as my sword," Evan said, "best Nihon-ja steel. Made it myself." They stared at her before Horace pointed out the obvious.

"But it looks like wood." He said. Evan rolled her eyes.

"Ever heard of a wolf in sheep's clothing?" she asked before tapping the end of his nose with the flat of the needle. "And I became a knight the same way you did. I trained." she grinned savagely. "And if you don't believe me, ask Halt here, or the Baron. Who we have to see. So, hop to it!" She strode off in the direction opposite the way to the Barons' office.

"It's this way!" The three of them called after her. She did a quick about face and sailed past them with a red face.


	4. Baron Arald

**acacia626: Well…...certainly has been a while, huh. Guess that's my fault. *dodges arrow* NOT FUNNY! *sigh***

**ureshiitamago: Long time no talk! *Dances a bit to avoid stones being thrown* I'm **_**sorry**_ **I have other fanfics to attend to! (And, you know, homework…)**

**acacia626: Don't we all. Wait…..only part of that applies to me. This is my only fanfic so far :3**

**DISCLAIMER: WE DON'T LIVE IN AUSTRALIA OR HAVE AUSSIE ACCENTS! *sigh* The only things we own are Evan, this storyline, and any other OCs that may or may not pop up :)**

**A mucho gracias to the lovely peoples who favorited/followed/reviewed! Thanks for waiting! Here's your (extremely late) next chapter!**

_She grinned savagely. "And if you don't believe me, ask Halt here, or the Baron. Who we have to see. So, hop to it!" She strode off in the direction opposite the way to the Barons' office._

"_It's this way!" The three of them called after her. She did a quick about face and sailed past them with a red face. _

**Chapter Four: Baron Arald**

Will looked at Evan as she marched behind Halt, but in front of Horace and himself. She was muttering something under her breath, and if he strained his ears, he could hear snippets of; '...stupid…...north shouldn't be that way….blasted toads…...unicorns, why unicorns?...bah humbug!' Will couldn't count how many times he had to grab Evan's arm to stop her from walking down the wrong hallway. He wondered why she was talking about unicorns and humbugs, but was grateful that she hadn't stabbed him with her knitting needle. Yet. They ascended the stairs, Halt and Will making no noise, Horace and Evan making so much noise (to the Rangers) that it set both the Ranger's teeth on edge.

"Could you walk _more_ loudly?" Will asked Horace. (Evan was too scary to tease...so far…) "I don't think the whole castle heard you yet!" Horace looked back (and down) at Will and grinned.

"We aren't in the woods running from Temujai, hiding from the Scotti, in Arridia being chased by Tulahagi, hiding from Tennyson, stalking Genovesans, or dodging Arisaka's men, you know." He said with a laugh. Evan reached up, and up, and smacked him on the back of the neck. (She was too short to reach his head)

"Always listen to Rangers…" she said, and then, seeing Halt's grin, "...except for Halt." Halt's face fell back to its normal scowl.

Will forced a snicker down as he heard Halt mutter something extremely unflattering about female knights and their incessant need to put other people down. He grit his teeth as Horace bumped into the wall, causing his chainmail to screech briefly on the stone. He glared up at Horace, sure that he was doing it on purpose. The all too innocent look on Horace's face confirmed it.

Halt stopped, causing a small pile-up in the stairwell. Evan stepped back, rubbing her nose from where she had bonked it on Halt's quiver. She glared daggers at him and slowly reached for her knitting needle, but the look on Halt's face stopped her. He turned around and faced Horace, eyes level due to the fact that Halt was standing two steps higher than Horace.

"Horace, can you stop being so noisy and annoying? The Baron does like to have peace and quiet, you know." Halt's acerbic tone lashed out, and Horace flinched, eyes down.

"Yeah...sorry Halt." Will looked at Horace, disbelief in his eyes. What, no apology to him? He snorted silently. Halt nodded once, then turned and continued up the stairs. Evan sighed and climbed after him, armour clanking with each step. Horace, a subdued look on his face, clanked after her. Will rolled his eyes to heaven, sighed, and silently followed them.

~lol linebreak~

Halt stopped in front of the Baron's door and, glancing back at his companions, knocked firmly on the door. Voices inside the room stopped, then one called out, "Come in!" Halt pulled open the heavy door and slipped to the side, letting the others pass through. He closed the door softly after Will entered, then turned and faced the desk. Surprisingly, Sir Rodney was there, and there was a tankard of ale on the Baron's desk surrounded by paperwork. Halt raised an eyebrow. Evan, on the other hand, gave a shout, and barreled into Rodney, hugging him and then thumping his back with great vigor.

"Rodney! Ya ol' bean! So good to see you after 20 years!" she laughed. Rodney grimaced, and said;

"Yeah, great to see you too. Tell you what, stop thumping me, and I'll hug you." the thumping immediately stopped, and Evan was swept up into a hug. Once the embrace was over, Evan turned to Arald, and quirked an eyebrow at him.

"Those whippersnappers over there," she jerked a thumb in the direction of Will and Horace, "don't believe that I'm a fully fledged knight." It was Arald's turn to raise an eyebrow. He turned to look at the two young men.

"You don't believe her even after seeing her wield her knitting needle?" He asked, disbelief evident in his voice. Will and Horace shifted uncomfortably, though Will hid it better than Horace. The Baron nodded.

"Well, it's true." He said with a sigh. "I was once on the receiving end of that needle, you know. It's rather sharp, and that wasn't an experience I'd like to repeat."

"Wasn't _my_ fault you woke me up from my nap!" Evan said, crossing her arms and glaring at the Baron. Arald gave a long suffering sigh, and looked at the two young men again.

"She's a knight." He said. Horace and Will decided to take his word for it. Once that confusion was over, the Baron got down to business.

"So, as you all know-"

"No, I don't." Evan interrupted. The Baron glared at her, but she didn't flinch, instead opting to whistle and look at the ceiling, trying to deny that she had said anything.

"As you all know, there has been some activity with some religious cults that seemed relatively harmless. We should have known there was something wrong, because they refused to accept any money from the villagers, but intermingled for a few months before leaving. However, after a few months, a few people in the villages would have a few people go missing. They never connected it to the 'believers' because they gave them no reason to suspect them. Now, we had received intelligence that they are slavers kidnapping Araluens to sell on the save market."

"So, we're going to bash up some slavers?" Evan asked with a mischievous twinkle in her eye. "Count me in!" Halt resisted the urge to face-palm.

"This isn't fun and games, _Evangeline_." Halt said. Will noticed Evan stiffen slightly. _Oh oh…_

"This is real life, with real people's lives at stake." Halt went on. The temperature in the room dropped a few notches, and Will was almost 100% certain that if he looked at Evan now, she would be surrounded in a snowstorm.

"I know that, _Halt_." Evan said, her voice icy and dripping with venom. "And I remind you to use _Evan_ when talking to me, or do not talk at all."

_Oooh boy…_ Will thought, sharing a glance with Horace. _This is going to be one awkward trip…_

**acacia626: By the way, we are going to be updating rather sporadically, since this is a co-op between us two loverly authors (shhhhh…..totally a word right there). We will try to get a somewhat regular scheduled working for the two of us…... Terribly sorry for all those who were waiting for….a while for this latest chappie. *cries* I'll work harder to get the next one out sooner! Hugs for all!**

**ureshiitamago: I don't give hugs...jk! HUGS!**


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